It’s been a while since I’ve posted here. To be honest, I haven't really known what to talk about. There’s just so much chaos and uncertainty in the world right now. Most days I’m left feeling exhausted, speechless, and if I’m being real, fearful.

How is a person supposed to just "live" in such uncertainty?

It’s a question I keep asking myself lately. Sometimes I just thank my lucky stars that I’m not being directly impacted by the chaos happening in the world, but even then, the weight of it feels heavy. It is hard to just "go about your day" and act like everything is normal when the background noise of the world feels so loud and unpredictable.

Lately, I feel like I’ve been completely detoured from my goals. I want to be productive and get things done, but the motivation just isn't there. My mind has been cluttered with so much noise that it’s hard to even find a quiet moment for myself. Even meditation, which usually helps me clear my head, has been a struggle. I sit down to find some peace, but the noise just follows me in. It’s like I can’t turn my brain off long enough to actually breathe.

In a weird way, I think I’ve been waiting. I’ve been waiting for the "perfect moment" to resume my life. Waiting for a day when the news isn't so heavy or when I feel 100% steady again.

But as we all know, that perfect moment doesn’t really exist. Life doesn't pause just because things are chaotic. I’m realising that if I keep waiting for the world to settle down before I start moving toward my goals again, I might be waiting forever.

So, I’m trying to start back up today. It’s not a perfect start, and the noise is still there, but it’s a start. I’m tired of standing still.